Overheard conversation from Audrey Winkler (was age 54, now age 8), transcribed August 17, 2001.

"Hello, Kevin? It's me, Audrey. I've escaped and I need your help. Please come and... No, Kevin, this isn't a practical joke or telephone prank by some little kid. For heaven's sake, Kevin. I'm your wife. Don't hang up. I'm not dead! Listen! The reason I sound like a little kid is because I am one. Specifically, I am now an 8-year-old girl.

"Now please listen carefully. I disappeared three months ago because I was kidnapped. I was taken to this secret lab where I was injected with all sorts of strange chemicals. They made me very sick, and I suffered severe pain, especially after my bones began to retract. All those treatments reversed my aging so that I'm no longer the 54-year-old woman you've been married to for 32 years.

"This is creepy. I'm now younger than our youngest child. And those ghouls wanted to make me still younger. But I finally penetrated their security and sneaked out. Now I'm at a pay phone up in Brighton Park. You can't miss me. I'm dressed in a grade school uniform with blue plaid skirt. Now quick! Please come and get me, because I know those monsters are out, scouring the streets, looking for me, so I won't expose they're little scheme.

"Don't 'ha-ha!' me, Kevin. I'm not a kid with a weird imagination. No, I don't like being younger either, but we'll both have to live with that. You cannot accept being married to a child? It's too weird? Too hard to explain? Now don't go flaky on me, Kevin. You come get me. Then we can take this to the police and... Kevin? You can't refuse to believe this happened. It did. Hey, don't go back to that business about this being a prank. I'm your wife and I want... Kevin? Hello, Kevin?"


Click here to go back to previous page