Dictation from Officer Faye Rantell (currently age 10), taped on July 13, 2001:

"Halt! Don't move! You are under arrest for the crime of being an adult. Don't look so puzzled! You're now in territory controlled by the Cult of Youth. And not by those Reform cultists who tolerate teenagers. We are true Orthodox cultists here. Nobody over the age of 10. And it is a serious crime to be older than 10 here.

"Now keep your hands where I can see them. Don't try any funny stuff, like trying to escape while I march you to the conversion center. If you go willingly, you can pick your own age to which you'll be converted. But if you resist, then we pick the age. And frankly, we like our troublemakers too young to walk.

"Okay, according to your identification cards, you are a Mr. Sean Ferguson. I've downloaded that data to headquarters. It seems your ex-fiancée Deirdre is already living in our territory. And she's overjoyed. She is currently 8-years-old, and requests that you be made no older than 5. Says she can't wait to renew her acquaintance with you. Hey! If you're going to keep doing that, maybe we should convert you so that wearing diapers in public won't be so conspicuous"



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