It was Saturday night, and Todd had just finished working out on the stationary bicycle in the bedroom. He spent a half an hour a day on the bike keeping in shape. At age 45, Todd was fit, and had managed to avoid the 'middle age spread' that seemed to attack many men his age. He was also secretly proud of his full head of brown curly hair. Todd showered, and rummaged through the walk-in closet that he shared with his wife, looking for a particular pair of jeans to throw on for an evening out. That's when he saw the plastic bags on the floor of his wife's side of the closet.
He lifted one of the bags from the bottom, spilling the contents onto the closet floor. More baby clothes! Little terrycloth sleepers! Sundresses! Did she buy this stuff just to piss him off?
Rose and Todd were arguing daily, their disagreements always boiling down to the same tired issue: Rose wanted a child and Todd did not. Todd was of the opinion that he was too old to be a parent; he had nearly 20 years on his wife and felt that he was much to be old to be dealing with diapers and midnight feedings. To Rose, the thought that she might go through life without ever having a baby of her own to cuddle and care for was terrifying. As time went on, the fighting got increasingly intense, and it came to a point where they both wondered if their marriage could survive.
To make matters worse, an outsider had wormed her way into their life. Rose was spending a lot of time with Opal, a woman she met at a psychic fair. Opal was tall, dark, and stunningly beautiful. She wore lots of gold jewelry with a particular fondness for large hoop earrings. Most of the time, Opals thick black hair was held back by a colorful bandana. Todd often thought that she'd look perfect huddled over a crystal ball and tarot cards.
In stark contrast to her friend, Rose was short, blond and very fair skinned. Pudgy, and a bit plain, Rose's best assets were her substantial breasts. They were firm and round, and she often wore snug sweaters or tight shirts to show them off. Together, Rose and Opal made a very strange, unlikely, pair.
Todd felt that Rose was spending far too much of her spare time with her new friend. It bothered him that on many occasions, he came home from work only to feel like an intruder in his own home, as if his arrival was interrupting something very important. Todd was finding it increasingly difficult to shake off the thought that Rose and Opal seemed to have developed a relationship that went beyond mere friends.
Also, Todd couldn't help but notice some changes in Rose. She was putting on heavier makeup, particularly around the eyes, and started wearing more jewelry.
At first he made an effort to be a part of their little group, but Todd found it hard to look directly at Opal; she had intense brown eyes the seemed to peer directly into his soul. Every time Todd attempted to engage Opal in conversation, her smile and piercing eyes would turn him into a stammering schoolboy. Opal's ability to elicit this response from Todd was a great source of amusement to both women, and had become a running joke between them, a gag that they never tried to hide from Todd.
He dressed, deciding not to confront his wife about the baby clothes he'd discovered. He was weary of fighting, and had other things on his mind. For a change, Opal didn't seem to be around, and he was hoping to take his wife out to dinner and a movie. He found her in the kitchen.
"Todd, I need to talk to you about something important," she began.
Sensing that he was being led into yet another argument, Todd sighed audibly. "You aren't going to bring up having a baby again, are you? We've been through that so many times."
"Listen to me Todd. I've been talking to Opal about this, and."
"Oh so THAT'S it! Opal's filled your head with a bunch of ideas! Now you just listen to ME!" Todd shouted angrily. Todd stood directly in front of Rose, his reddening face just inches from hers. "I don't want her around here any more! Keep her out of my house." Todd's arms were folded in front of his chest, and his hands were clenched in fists.
Rose had never seen Todd act this way before; it was the adult equivalent to a child's temper tantrum. She half expected him to stomp his feet. She wasn't sure why she found it so funny, but it was all she could do to keep from laughing at him.
"You seem to be forgetting," she reminded him, "That it's my house too. In fact, technically it was my money that bought this house in the first place."
She was right of course. It had been her money that paid for the house. Rose had received a large inheritance from a wealthy uncle a few months before their marriage. Todd turned in defeat and sank heavily into the recliner in the living room.
It occurred to Rose that she had gone too far. She followed her husband into the living room and, kneeling next to his chair, caressed the top of his leg sympathetically. "Opal can help us with this honey. She comes from people that know about these things." She paused as if she were wondering if she should continue, then took a deep breath.
"What would you say if I told you that Opal could make you younger?" she whispered, as if someone might overhear. "That's the reason you don't want a baby isn't it? Because you think you're to old"
Todd's mood changed dramatically. He began laughing hysterically. With tears streaming from his eyes, Todd had to fight to regain his composure. "So that's what this is all about," he chortled. "She's trying scam us!" Suddenly he squinted, as if a though just occurred to him. "You didn't give her any money, did you?"
Ignoring the question, she continued. "Wouldn't you like to be younger?"
"Of course I would, Rose," he replied condescendingly, wiping his eyes. "But that's just not the way it works. If you think that you can buy something from that weird gypsy to change the laws of nature, you're just being gullible and childish. She's only trying to cheat us out of a few bucks. She just wants our money; don't you get it? That's the way those type of people are!"
Todd suddenly noticed his wife looking beyond him, over his shoulder. He turned in his chair to find Opal standing directly behind him in the doorway that led to the front porch. He had no doubt that she had heard every word. Shaking his head, Todd stood, shrugged, and stood up to leave the room.
"You know, there may come a point that you have to choose between me and a fucking baby," Todd said as he walked out. "Are you ready to do that?"
Smiling strangely, she responded too softly for her husband to hear. "I think that there just might be a way that I can have both."
Todd stormed up the steps and angrily slammed the door to the bedroom. He watched TV for a while, then went to bed. He woke up briefly when his wife joined him, glancing at the clock to see that it was just before midnight, then fell back asleep almost immediately.
Sometime during the night, Todd woke up with severe stomach pain. In the darkness, he stumbled to the bathroom just in time; unleashing an enormous amount of dark, foul, waste into the toilet. He thought that it would never end. Staggering back to his bed, he curled into a fetus position on the sheet, too weak to pull a blanket over his naked trembling body. His head hurt and it felt like someone was twisting his vital organs from the inside. He'd never experienced such absolute agony. He remembered that the bed seemed to spin, rotating faster and faster as the room grew icy cold. Shivering violently, Todd vomited, puking vile, green, viscous, fluid onto the down duvet, then his bowels betrayed him once more.
Through all of this, in his misery, Todd could occasionally hear his wife speaking, in low hushed tones. Who was she talking to and why wasn't she helping him? Why hadn't she called an ambulance? The last thing that Todd heard before slipping (or diving) into unconsciousness was Opal's voice. "It's OK baby. Auntie Opal will clean up the mess. You just go to sleep."
Todd woke up the next morning and his pain was gone. So was his world.
The mattress that he was laying on was stiff and hard, and it crinkled when he moved. He tried to use the wooden bars around the bed to pull himself to his feet, but he seemed to lack the strength. Looking down at his body, he discovered that he was dressed in a yellow terrycloth footed sleeper, his legs forced apart by folds of cold wet fabric.
Then he saw Rose and Opal looking down at him. Impossibly huge, they were beaming, joyfully embracing each other over his bed like proud new parents. When a pair of massive hands reached in for him, a pitiful sound from a hopeless, helpless, frightened little soul drifted out of the window of the nursery and into the morning air.
Three days later Todd Horton lay on his stomach and studied his image in the mirror. Rose was absolutely right; Opal had the power to give his wife everything she wanted.
Opal had just finished giving him his bath. She'd paused after washing what was left of his hair, and admonished him not to move while she reached for a wash cloth. He wondered where she thought that he might go. Escaping from the little plastic baby tub was far beyond his capabilities. Besides, he wasn't about to disobey with his tender bottom so accessible, the witch had made it painfully obvious over the past couple of days that she was in charge.
Within seconds, she returned. He shivered as she ran the course, wet cloth over his sensitive skin, whimpering as he pushed ineffectively at the giant fingers that gently dabbed and tugged at the tiny remnant of his manhood.
"Good boy. Now let's get you dressed," she whispered, as she wrapped him in a large fluffy towel and carried him to the double bed in the next room. "Your mommy will be home in a few minutes. She's going to be so surprised to see her little man all clean and ready for bed."
She pulled the cotton diaper up between his legs, pinning the corners at both of his hips, and put him in his crib. As Todd looked at his reflection in the mirror and waited for 'Auntie Opal' to return with his clothes, he remembered the smaller outfits on the floor of the closet, and prayed silently that Rose was happy with Opal's handiwork.
Auntie Opal kept telling him that if he was a VERY good boy,
a happy baby, just maybe Auntie Opal wouldn't make him any smaller.