Sylvia Ryder has been extremely tired and exasperated with her husband ever since he volunteered for that experimental youth treatment and became a 20-month-old baby. As an infant, Oscar had become extremely demanding, insisting that she even hold the baby bottle for him during feedings. And he thought nothing of yowling at 3 a.m. to get a diaper change or an added feeding, and thus ruining Sylvia's sleep.
But despite insisting on being treated like a baby, he maintained some of his adult quirks. These included hogging the TV remote control and putting on programs only he liked. Sylvia now objected to this, as she no longer thought The Playboy Channel was appropriate viewing for a boy under 2-years-old.
One afternoon while Oscar was tucked in his crib for his afternoon nap (he called it a siesta), Sylvia brought in a TV repairman to install a V-chip. He also reprogrammed the remote so when Oscar tried to access an adult program, he'd get something more suited for his new age. Later that afternoon, Oscar grabbed the remote and aimed it at the TV set. But instead of getting the lingerie fashion show he wanted to watch, he found himself staring at colorful rounded creatures with antennas on the heads cavorting in a meadow and saying things like "Eh-oh" and "Again! Again!"
After nearly 20 minutes of trying the change the channel,
Oscar
ran screaming from the room. "This is unconstitutional! It's
cruel and unusual punishment," the baby cried. Sylvia smiled,
"If he doesn't like 'Teletubbies,' there's always 'Blue's
Clues,'"